I received my progesterone levels and were shocked to hear they were 7.5 when they should be 15. I was told I would have to be taking extra progesterone in order to conceive. I still took more home pregnancy tests though because as my fellow BBCer's know, the show ain't over until AF shows. So I had taken 4 tests...all negative. I thought for sure we were out this month which was expected considering it was only the first month trying. Yet I didn't want to believe that a week after I turned 21, I was diagnosed with infertility. It was so easy with Xander, why is it hard this time? Why are all of these things appearing now? If we had caught it with Xander, would I still be pregnant? I should be 35 weeks. His due date is 5 weeks away! Why am I going through this instead?
Well last Saturday I had one test left. One staring at me saying "take me! Take me! I'm only going to give you a BFN (big fat NEGATIVE) but take me anyway. So I did and set it aside while I finished up my business. I couldn't believe what I saw when I looked down....
HOLY SHIT! Is that a 2nd line? It can't be. I was diagnosed with secondary infertility 5 days ago. So I took another one. A digital so I didn't have to worry about reading lines.
It can't get more positive than that. I told Rob and we talked about whether or not to tell the family. I told him after the first test then we went together to buy the 2nd one. We got home from the store and my brother, also our roommate told us that his friend was moving into our neighborhood and now he has someone to live with once I "pop out that bun in the oven". Rob and I looked at each other and I knew I couldn't hide it from my brother, especially living with him. So we told him. Then told the rest of our families. We can't hide it plus if something happens I want to have the same support we did with Xander.
So here we are blessed with another miracle. No one else knows, we are keeping it off of the dreaded facebook. Well now my cousin Lacy knows and I guess I hadn't told her so Lacy, if you are reading this, KEEP IT OFF OF FACEBOOK PLEASE lol. Thank you.
I can't even explain how scared I am, how scared we are. I am only 5 weeks. But like I said, it's weird. I should have 5 weeks left with Xander, not be 5 weeks brand new pregnant. I feel better with my new doctor though and have an awesome plan in place. No one will even know I am pregnant unless they see me. Obviously I won't be showing for another 10 weeks but I'm just saying, I'm not gonna blurt it out to everyone online because I am not innocent anymore. I know pregnancy doesn't always result with a take home baby. And it's sad.
